Best Raisin Nut Cake Ever

1 c. margarine               1 tsp. baking soda
1 c. sugar                   1 c. brown sugar
6 lg. eggs                   1 lb. mixed nuts
1 tsp. baking powder         1 or 2 qt. good brandy
1 c. raisins

First, sample the brandy. Good, isn't it?  Now start. Select a
large mixing bowl, measuring cup, etc. Check the brandy again, as
it must be just right. To be sure the brandy is of the highest
quality, pour 1 level cup into a glass and drink as fast as you can.
Repeat.

With an electric mixer, beat 1 cup margarine in a large fluffy bowl.
Add 1 teaspoon of thugar and beat again. Meanwhile, make sure the
brandy is the finest quality. Cry another cup. Open second quart
if nethethary. Add 2 arge leggs, 2 cups fried raisins, and beat
until high. If naisins gets stuck in beaters, just pry it loos with
a drewscriver.

Sample the brandy again to tonsicsticity. Nex sift two cups of salt
or anything. Id doesn't really madder. Sample the brandy again.
Add one hablespoon of brown thugar, or whatever color you can find
and vix mell. Grease roven and turn cake pan to 350 gredees. Now
pour the whole mess into roven and ake. Check the brandy again and
go to bed.

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